Friday, April 6, 2012

Dwight Howard's Hilariously Awkward Folly

Move over LeBron James- Dwight Howard is the new king of bad PR.

Taste Test: Lex Luthor used Coca-Cola. He failed.
Orlando's center- the same guy who tugged on the heartstrings of Magic fans up to the March trade deadline- created a classic scene when he abruptly walked into an interview session with Stan Van Gundy after SVG said that his superstar was lobbying for his removal from the coaching position. Superman proceeded to hug his coach and ask if the rogue journalist who reported on Howard's sabotage plan was present.

He was all smiles and was as confident as Van Gundy- that is, until Van Gundy left him on stage. What followed was an awkward mix of "I don't know" baby faces and backtracking that should give Howard the confidence he needs to pursue a career in politics after he retires.

What did we learn?

  • Stan Van Gundy should do Pepsi commercials. Seriously, the man spoke so candidly with reporters, and when his tormenter entered the fray- a good four feet taller than Stan, by the way- he stood his ground with a nonchalant smile before setting Howard up for a media session that nearly put "The Decision" to shame.
  • Howard is a malcontent who needs new PR people. He probably needs better people around him period. Michael Jordan's former agent, David Falk, recently said in an interview with Sports Illustrated that in today's digital age, players don't need to go to big markets to be marketable. Apparently, Howard doesn't get that.
  • The Orlando Magic franchise continues to crash and burn. Say SVG is done: what good coaches are willing to work under management so weak that it caves to a superstar's every demand? What good coaches and free agents want to work under management that can't even keep situations like this in-house? It's quite sad, because Orlando has a strong fan base in a great city. And they have some good, hard-working players like Jameer Nelson and J.J. Redick, too.
At this point, Orlando fans are clamoring for simpler times, when an incredibly overpriced contract for Rashard Lewis, an ill-advised trade for Gilbert Arenas, and a multitude of other poor moves by the team's inept GM, Otis Smith, were the only problems that existed for the franchise.

Simpler times they were indeed.

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